urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:krystle13krystle13krystle13krystle132005-08-17T21:05:36Zurn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:krystle13:753Random2005-08-17T21:05:36Z2005-08-17T21:05:36Z"Follow Through" Gavin DeGrawI woke up this morning when Kellen got in bed with us at 4. I couldnt back to sleep thinking about this school stuff and what the heck I am going to do. Both classes that I need to take are offered online, but I dont know that I want to take on 2 online classes as well as 3 classes I have to go to. I guess we will see when I talk to Betty on Friday.<br />Bleh...school starts on Monday and I have done absolutely nothing this week to get ready for it. I am more than unhappy with the whole situation. I do not want Jon here everyday when I get home. I don't like him being around my kids as it is, but especially when I am not around. He is not a good influence on them and Sandy won't speak up to him, it drives me nuts! Anyway, its going to be a stressful semester and I have been an emotional wreck lately. This will be the first time that I have had to leave Grace and even though I know she will be just fine, its going to be hard to leave her. <br />I got upset with Matt last night because I am so tired of him being tired every f*ing day! He passes out as soon as the kids go down and that means we have no time for each other. I tried to talk to him about school last night because I was stressed not having taken the WCT and me telling him and trying to get some support only made him stressed and in turn, upset me more than I was previous to mentioning anything. <br />Grace is doing so much right now! Her and Kellen have become the best of friends and it is so sweet to watch. She dances when he sings his songs and she has started clapping and saying Nuh, Nigh! Officially her first word :) I love love LOVE this age :)<br />I was thinking about the option of having another baby in time today and I think I am happy now. I do not want to go through pregnancy again and even though I love the newborn stage so much, it isnt going to last any longer if we do it again and I will want another once that one is past it. The only thing that I keep going back to is that I want Grace to have a sister more than anything. My sisters are my best friends and I cant imagine denying that from her. But is that enough of a reason? Am I being selfish in my reasoning? As much as I hate taking BC and hate the things that it does to my body, I am not ready to do anything permanent and Matt hasnt insisted on anything either. Even though we both agreed that he would get the Big V once we were done. <br />Random thoughts...<br /><br />oh and my mom is driving me insane! Does she not freaking remember what it is like with kids? We always have to go to her house ANYTIME we do anything! She offered and insisted that we let her babysit the other night and then wanted us to bring the kids THERE.....after her and Dave went to a movie and before she spent the night babysitting! It pissed Matt and I off!